Monday, October 29, 2007

Smärtsamma övergångar

Jag har så svårt att avsluta saker, vad som helst. Jag vill inte avsluta denna kväll, eftersom den är rätt underbar. På morgonen vill jag inte sluta äta frukost. Processen att övergå från ett skede till ett annat är rentav smärtsam.
Jag är skitdålig på avslutningar. Kolla bara hur jag gör det här: SLUT!

Friday, October 26, 2007

Fast and pray


Forgive my indignation if this message comes to you as a surprise. AS IT MAY INTEREST YOU TO KNOW, I GOT YOUR IMPRESSIVE INFORMATION THROUGH THE INTERNET SEARCH HERE IN OUAGADOUGOUBURKINA-FASO. I FASTED AND PRAYED FORTHREE DAYS BEFORE I CONTACT YOU TO BE MY PARTNER.


I guess there mails are known to almost anyone by now. Poor people!
But this one took the price. He found my "impressive information" through the internet search, and even fasted and prayed before he contacted me!

Friday, October 12, 2007

Fjutte has something to sell


Dear People,

I am pleased and delighted to have contact with you via this medium. My name is Fjutte. I am a cockatiel and Swedish by nationality. I personally decided to contact you so that we can negotiate reasonably and have a successful business transaction together.

I have 150 kilogram of 22plus Carat Alluvial Gold Dust which I inherited from my late father, which I have decided to put on sale for sometimes now. I need a serious minded buyer who will purchase them from me within the shortest time possible. If you are interested, kindly indicate it in your reply to this attractive offer I have presented to you.

This is the primary reason why I have attached my Full Corporate Offer (FCO) in this mail you are reading for your personal evaluation and consideration.If my offer is acceptable to you, kindly let me know immediately so that we can proceed accordingly. Please be informed that my gold price is also negotiable. Please find below my Full Corporate Offer (FCO) for the sale of my AU Metal dust:

(FULL CORPORATE OFFER)

OWNER OF AU METAL--------------- Fjutte
PRODUCT: -------------------------- Alluvial Gold Dust (AU).
ORIGIN: --------------------------- Unknown
QUANTITY: ------------------------ 150 kilograms.
QUALITY: -------------------------- 22+carat.
PRICE PER KILOGRAM: ------------$16,000USD (Negotiable).
PACKAGING: ------------------------ Securely packaged In
a Galvanized metal box.

TERMS OF PAYMENT,
Payment must be made in cash or via Telegraphic Transfer (T/T) or Wire Transfer within 72hours to a specified bank account to be recommended by my Lawyer. I will patiently wait for your reply on the above subject matter soonest. Looking forward to having a successful transaction with you. Have a pleasant nice day.

Yours Sincerely,
Fjutte

Sunday, October 07, 2007



Internet is hell of a good thing when it works but when it doesn´t work it drives you nuts and insane, just makes you stare at the stupid "försök igen senare"- messages and push the button furiously ten times in a row, while giving it a manipulating look "nu satan fungerar du din helvetes pissröv", makes you want to throw the machine at the floor and torture it, jump on it and scream at it, as if it would help in some way, as if those bugs would jump out of the system with their hands on their neck while begging for mercy and promising never to cause any problems anymore. During the last week one problem has gone into another, like several different stupid problems with different possible solutions, and it´s driving me insane cause I have fucking business to do here! As you can see..